self-hurting

Sigh . .

i know i am just hurting myself more with all this asking and not getting an answer. But, your actions sometimes just confuses me. I have my own blame, and im very unhappy about it, yet is there anything left to salvage?

i really dont know.

i miss you badly – your touch, your hugs, your kisses. I miss you as if i had not seen you in ages, because, that is how it really feels, eventhough i see you everyday. Others may like me, may want to help me forget, but i dont want to. I just want you.

that is my only wish, and no matter how much i seem to block it out, from others’ eyes, i know i havent really. i have been lying to everyone, especially myself, that i have gotten over you – maybe for awhile, i have, but not overall.

it’s those little things you do, that pull me back. But, i know it’s like falling over, and over, again, whenever this happens. Im just floating in mid-air, not knowing what’s happening; neither coming, nor going. Probably, waiting for you to accept me again, though i think it is near never for that

rainie rainie

not much of a surprise – it’s raining today, and all plans have been ruined. Sighh

We, Joyce, Glen, Vin, Rosa and myself, had initially planned to go Hiking, but because Joyce and Glen hadnt woke, i made a last min change of going Cycling instead. Unfortunately, that had to be cancelled, as well, because it started raining damn heavily. Hmm.. i think Sundays should be said as ”the rainy day”, because whenever we plan something on Sunday, it rains – esp when i have decided to go Cycling. Somehow, i think the weather has a taboo on me cycling, at all.

grr …

Anyways, now the plan is to go slack at Buangkok. Gosh .. i do not know whether i should be glad, or bored.. bleahx

:x: happenings :x:

been ages since i last wrote a post here, and i have to admit that i do miss writing in here. Scolling down on past events, i realised how much has happened, and how far i have come since then.

Although life hasn’t been easy, or better, it’s still ‘breathable’ in a way. Well, not much has changed, nor gotten resolved, but since this is a new post for 2009, im going to skip alot of stuff – cos i doubt my memory is  THAT bad, to have forgotten those things, unless their not memorable. (LOL)

Todays the 28th of March, Saturday morning, and Joyce, Rosa and myself are 3 lifeless creatures who are at Changi Airport – T3 – since 10pm – it’s 5am, now. We are sitting at Starbucks, with a few ppl next to us, who have no life, just like us. LOL.

Seriously, T3, if not Changi Airport itself, can be my 2nd home. All im missing is a sleeping bag – esp snce the Starbucks and Popeye’s here are 24hrs. (kwahkwahkwah).

Sheesh.. the economy is so damn horrible, now, that it’s damn damn hard to clinch a job. I’ve sent out more than a dozen resumes to different company’s, yet not much have replied (sad). But, since i am still holding onto mycurrent job, at Ubi, i shall not let my spirit get dampened !! wahahaha … so much for positive thinking, aye ?!

I think im going to turn into a Zombie soon. Joyce has this crazy obsession of TONNING .. lol.. if she could, she’d ton forever, and ever, and ever … -mati-  Yesterday, this crazy woman (joyce) tried to kill me, at the ‘playground’ near her area. Otherwise, she was trying to make me paralized.. Idiot … bahx..

( Stupidwoman is standing behind me, taking a picture of me blogging this =.= )

heh heh .. can’t wait for Sundayyyy !! Hikingggg !! wahaha .. Wish me luck i dont fall and break my leg, or at least whatever there is left to break – no thanks to joyce …

Cheeriossie ~!!